Yesterday I was a hot mess. I couldn’t talk right. I said one thing and meant another. Good communicator I was not.
Then it dawned on me, it wasn’t just one day, I had been a hot mess for a few weeks.
The source of my hot messiness? Lack of motivation. I had lost my juju. I had been looking for a sign. I was even fearful that I would miss something.
“Well, good, no more nonsense, Shanon, choice made, 3, 2, 1 go!” I thought to myself. It was immediately followed by, “But I like being goofy, having freedom and play.” I re-calibrated.
Nonsense – Things that happen that aren’t good for me often originating from what other people say or do in my vicinity.
What I want – To be myself. Infinite. Sacred. Goddess.
At the crossroads there is clarity. I am a hot mess, you know why? I try things. I quit things. I listen when my intuition says, this isn’t right for you. And I (sure as hell) am committed to living life.
I try before I’m ready because I know I’ll figure it out.
I go before I know where because I sense I’ll land exactly where I’m meant to be.
I don’t doubt it because I sense free will and destiny are buds and I’m part of their crew.
It’s a crew of misfits, with a dash of hot mess mavens, willing to listen, live and be themselves.
I believe the future of education is:
Beautiful learning environments
Student created pathways
Teachers as 1. Facilitators and 2. Content Experts
To get from here to there WE need:
Teacher led transformation
A move from professional development to personal development
Public input into future design
Determination of where the future is being created from
Freedom from self imposed systemic barriers
“I acknowledge it is a transformation and feels like a revolution.” – Shanon Solava-Reid
This statement is powerful because the end result of change is transformation. A transformation results in something unrecognizable. A revolution is a modification. I desire more than a modification of existing systems and structures. More people need to aim for transformation. As more people do so, our innate inter-connectivity will support the inevitable changes.
Out of Sorts – a sense of restlessness defined by self doubt; feeling like something isn’t right
I’ve been feeling “out of sorts” lately. Trauma. Drama. Avoidance. Distance. Rest. Grounded. Renewal. Ease. Love. All better.
Not exactly. There is plenty of self improvement going on here.
That is my process for processing life in a nutshell, though. I’m a bit of lone wolf when it comes to processing the crap that happens in life. Well, crap, amazingness, anything that evokes emotion. And since my heart is always pumping there is plenty of ‘lone wolfing’ going on.
I also like working with really great people. People who enjoy whimsy, freedom, grandiose thinking and take action. People who are willing to help other people by sharing their talents. I find it humbling.
It’s always humbling to have a stranger do something for you. It’s always humbling to receive a gift from a friend. It’s always humbling to be loved by the people you love. I am humbled.
I believe there is a connection between the feeling of humble and having a sense of being out of sorts. I envision it as the emotional sphere’s sense of balance.
“Oh, you’re feeling out of sorts?” says the goddess of the emotional sphere. Here’s a reminder you’re not alone.
What can one do but delight?
Let this serve as a reminder in this heightened time of ‘out of sortness,’ that you’re not alone. Your intentions have a ripple effect. My intentions have a ripple effect. We’re in this together, let’s be kind to one another.
Mary Anne Radmacher’s quote is, “courage does not always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, ‘I will try again tomorrow’.”
Pause and think about that for a moment……….breath in the light and breath out letting go……..
I had this quote posted on my refrigerator when I was going through a difficult time in my career.
I would stare at the quote wondering what it meant.
At the time, it motivated me to keep trying. I took several actions, none of which worked at first.
It was only when I let go, that things started to work for me.
They spun out of control, I felt like a tornado. Rushed, never calm.
Then one day I realized – trying, starting and creating are what I like to do. I have no tolerance for negative people. Complaints should be registered else where. I like to try to make things work. I’ve said, “we can try that,” on many occasions.
I stared at the quote today. I wondered what this quote meant for me now. I’ve changed, has it?
My dog distracted me. He couldn’t quite get to his food ball (a large ball you put food in for your dog to slow down his vacuum-like eating habit.) I smiled at him and said, “you can do it.” He tried, it didn’t work, he stared at me, I smiled back at him. He tried again, squatting deep under the TV stand. He wrapped his teeth around the ball and dragged it, just far enough to give it a push with his nose. “Your did it!” I said.
I looked back at the quote and smiled. It’s funny how lessons enter your life at just the right time. What did Salem and the quote teach me, today? A little inspiration, self reflection, healing and encouragement create a path for courage and trust.
How am I bound to be successful? This question is not a question about success. It’s about re-membering, being in your bliss, adapting, testing boundaries, dreaming and your fantastic reality.
I’m bound to be successful is a way of thinking. So many times we catch ourselves saying “I’ll try my best.” Let’s be honest, trying is our way of dealing with reality, but it’s not exactly the most positive approach to life. It’s a way for us to grapple with reality.
I’m bound to be successful is a declaration. It’s a recognition that you have what you need, to do what you want. You’re bound to be successful!
A call comes in, maybe from a child, a friend or a person waiting for you and they pop the question, where are you?
What if we ask this same question of ourselves? Where are you?
Where are you when you’re driving your car here and there? You are at the helm of approximately 5,000 lbs of metal. Depending on your speed, that is a lot of power and force you control. And yet, we eat, we sing and dance, we gawk, we talk on the phone, we distract ourselves from driving.
So, where are you AND what are you doing? So many people get distracted by the questions – where am I going OR my favorite, why am I here? We’ll get there, I promise. Honestly, if we won’t get there, it’s because we didn’t start here – WHERE ARE YOU?
Need an activity to help you figure out where you are? Start listening, truly listening, to the questions asked of you by your most influential person. Your most influential person is the person in your life that causes you to act the most. Remember thinking is an act. For two weeks, consistently write down the questions this person asks. After two weeks, review and reflect on the questions. Then determine where you are. Mark your ‘X.”
A declaration is made – I’m going to get there.
Where do I start?
It’s time for a leap
What will I do when I fall?
It’s time for a leap
It’s time for a leap
Let’s rest some more.
Renew your soul.
What will happen when I go from here to there?
Where is there?
What is there?
I like here.
I’m wrapped in my warm comfy blanket.
Surrounded by the familiar.
But I want to be there.
I know I should be grateful for here.
I am grateful here.
But I want to be there.
I am going there.
And into the unknown I go,
from here to there.
What does having it all mean to you? I have to admit, I’ve recently been feeling stuck and burdened by the freedom of choice. I must have said, WTF to myself a hundred times in the last 3 months. Then, this question came into my awareness – what does having it all mean to you? And life is flowing once again.
Here’s my list. It’s what I plan to focus and manifest over the next few months/years.
- Freedom of choice – having it, using it, demonstrating it.
- Independence – of thought, of physical movement, earnings and love.
- A sense of belonging
- Enjoying the continuous pursuit of unleashing the power within me.
- My hubby.
- Financial freedom – able to pay the bills one time, purchase what I want when I want it, some savings.
- Intellectual challenges.
- Color, patters and scents.
- Movement of my body, light and energy.
- The ability to heal.
- Basic needs met. Roof, optimal temp, safety, water and food.
- Freshness, specifically when it comes to food.
- Being loved.
- Music, especially by powerful blues singers and women.
- Meaningful work.
- Nature and a sense of responsibility around interconnectedness.
- Alone time.
- Drinks – water, stout, tea and coffee.
I’ve been involved in a social change project on and off for over ten years. Recently, about 24 months ago, I got significantly more involved after a hiatus. The most frustrating part of the process is the current point.
It’s the point in the process where commitment has been confirmed. There is a plan in hand. It’s go time and nothing is moving. If you spoke to me two months ago, I would have said, “We’re on track. I think we’re moving in the right direction and the timing is perfect.” My comment would not have contained an ounce of idealism or hope. Simply facts.
What changed? This is the thing, I don’t know. I’m in the middle of it. I need to step back.
What I do know is stable ground has been created and this chaotic feeling; it will pass. The work will go on. The change I’m involved with will probably be stronger as a result of this current chaos. Here is why:
1. Change has cycles. Much like the cycles of life, everything is going to be okay.
2. Investment has been made in people. People make the difference, especially in the type of work that takes passion and heart like social change.
3. Good stuff always happens after the chaos. I would have to study social change for many more decades because I can conclusively prove why. Right now, I just know. In the event you want to know now, check out this article by fellow Community Psychologist Neil Boyd.
4. I have a plan.
Life has many warning signs. The gut feeling that you shouldn’t go there or you should leave now. The consistent internal conflict that arises from a certain relationship. The big arrow saying this way placed beside the path of least resistance. Life becomes full of maybes – fast and furious. The karma is devastating. The karma takes you higher.
Reality is you get sick, you cry (a lot), you feel frustrated and down right unhappy. Good for you, you are aware. You’re alive.
I’ve been thinking about my soul journey. What are the sign posts? What are the warning signs? Am I doing the right things? Am I being me? I am thinking big enough? Small? Does it even matter what I think?
Then it happened. A sense inside me that can only be described as inner peace. I learned a new word, equanamous. I felt radiant. I got tired. I got up from the nap and took a walk. Up and down. Up and down I went. Year to year, month to month, day by day in the moment and out.
Up and down WE go. And I realized, they aren’t warning signs. They are sensations. Sensations that say, you’re human. Just be. The shift happened and I won’t ever be the same.